broken relationships

I realized today that I have a lot of broken relationships in my life. From childhood friends whom I've pushed away to cousins I never got to know, my life is just filled with them. A lot of the time I could have done more to care, but sometimes I made the move again and again and I got pushed away. Or maybe I'm just too easily discouraged.

I just can't read certain people. I don't know what they think about me, about our relationship. I don't understand those people who talk with me online but don't even look at me when we meet in person. I don't know if I still like my childhood friends. Usually people in church. I grew up with them, essentially, but we've nothing much in common now. Why is it so much harder to belong in church than at college? Shouldn't our common background and belief give us something to talk about and ground our relationship?

So many questions...no answers.